Fruitful Motherhood
Fruitful Motherhood: Getting Real about the Fruit of the Spirit
Devotion & Humility
By: Brittany Shields
“When we abide in the Spirit, we take on a new nature in Christ, we are no longer branches bound for death. We are now grafted into a living, fruitful vine which causes us to bear good fruit.” — Sarah Morrison, The Fruit of the Spirit
This past year I taught my daughters a song to remember the fruit of the Spirit. And then I started the Daily Grace Co. study called The Fruit of the Spirit.
And I realized that though I, myself, learned a song about it in childhood, I haven’t done much reflecting on this in adulthood.
Is this passage in Galatians one of those things that becomes too familiar?
So I decided to also read Jerry Bridge’s book, The Fruitful Life, and write a blog series on the fruit of the Spirit reflecting on its relationship to motherhood. [Most of the quotes from this series are from these two books.]
Galatians 5:16-26 contrasts the works of the flesh and the fruit of the Spirit.
There are two lists. One that, when practiced, separates us from God. And one that, when practiced, makes us more Christlike.
But we read these lists and we must ask two questions:
Why would I exhibit these characteristics?
How can I exhibit these characteristics?
The first highlights our motives and the second reveals the Source of our power to do it.
I think about being a mom to my kids. I think about how I see their sin nature daily. And how I respond with my sin nature.
Am I kind and gentle or harsh? Am I patient or impatient? Am I self-controlled when I’m frustrated and weary or am I reactive in ways I have to apologize to them for later?
Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
Being a mom is so hard. How am I supposed to do these things? And on my good days am I patting myself on the back and thinking about how good of a mom I am? Am I checking a box on my resume for heaven?
Devotion
If I want to truly ‘keep in step with the Spirit’ as this passage says, and see the fruit— the overflow— of the Spirit’s work in my life, I need to check my motivations and my source.
The first three chapters in Bridges’ book look at these.
He says, “Devotion to God is the only acceptable motive for actions that are pleasing to God.”
He goes on to depict the triangle of devotion to God. The bottom corners— the foundation— are fear of God and love of God. The apex is desire for God.
Fear of God in this context is less of fear of His wrath and more of the reverence for His power, His majesty, and His holiness. Combine this with love for Him that is rooted in his sacrifice on the cross for us while we were still His enemies.
“The fear of consequences may keep us from committing the outward acts of murder or adultery, but only love will keep us from committing murder or adultery in our hearts.”
Right fear and love lead us to obedience because we understand both that our sin is “an affront” to His holiness and that he paid the price for our sins out of love for us.
Both of these make us gaze upon the beauty of God— his attributes. We see his love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control throughout the entire Bible. We desire more of God and more of who He is. As we try to exhibit these characteristics we are imaging God himself.
Devotion to him is a life centered on the person of God, a life in full submission to his will, obedience predicated on love and reverence.
“These two attitudes complement and reinforce each other, producing within our souls an intense desire for this One who is so awesome in His glory and majesty and yet so condescending in His love and mercy.”
Humility
So if our motivation is not for vain morality or ‘being better’ than other moms, and we are rightly motivated by our devotion to God, we are still left to wonder how we could ever bear this fruit.
Well, they are the fruit of the Spirit. Produced by the Spirit working in our hearts.
We cannot do it on our own. The works of the flesh listed in Galatians are what results when a person seeks to fulfill their own desires. It is selfishness in rebellion to God. It is what our sinful nature generates.
But when we receive the Spirit, God makes us a new creation. (Eph 4:22-24) We must put off our old self, immersed in our sin nature, and we put on our new self, sustained by the Spirit. We are given new hearts and new desires.
Bridges likens it to an electric motor. We are not like a car running with a self-contained power source, but we must be plugged into our Source. “Our source of power is in the risen Christ, as we stay connected to Him by beholding Him in His Word and depending on Him in prayer.”
“Humility with regard to ourselves, then, consists in ascribing all that we are, all that we have, and all that we have accomplished to the God who gives us grace.” (Bridges)
We must have the right posture before God. We must depend on Him, not ourselves. We must give Him glory, not ourselves.
And so as we are humbled before the Lord and his power, we ask the Spirit who will give us all we need to be loving, joyful, peaceable, kind, gentle, patient, faithful, and self-controlled.
“Humility opens the way to all other godly character traits. It is the soil in which the other traits of the fruit of the Spirit grow.”
Surprise Enneagram
“We are responsible for exhibiting all of the traits of godly character in a balanced fashion. Some traits are more difficult to grow in than others. These will require extra prayer and attention on our part, but that is simply the price we must pay to grow in godlikeness.”
The Ennegram is a really popular way for people these days to understand their fears, motivations, and ways of responding to people. People love personality tests that ‘understand them.’ We like to be known. We like explanations. But I often see it as an excuse for certain behaviors or reactions- “I’m a 6 so that’s just the way I am. Sorry bout it.”
I think we can do this with the fruit of the Spirit too. ‘She is just more nurturing than I am. I’m more of a faithful and consistent and reliable mother, but my strong suit isn’t gentleness’ or ‘She’s the patient mom. I’m a really impatient person, but I’m a fun mom! I always come up with creative and funny games.’
No. We don’t just pick the attributes we think our ‘ours’ and leave the others for the more inclined.
“The fruit of the Spirit is not a matter of temperament; it is the result of the individual Christian seeking to grow, under the direction and aid of the Spirit, in every area of Christian character.”
People often say the ‘fruits’ of the Spirit (plural) as if each one is a different fruit that we work on. But it’s actually fruit (singular) and is better viewed as all slices of the same fruit. When we work on one, we are working on all of them.
Where We Are Headed
Now that we’ve been introduced to why we pursue the fruit of the Spirit and how we do that, we’re going to look at each individual trait in the Galatians list. We know Paul did not mean his list to be exhaustive and there are many other attributes of God we are called to exemplify, but for the sake of sticking to the passage, we’re going to go through the nine in the weeks to come.
I didn’t decide to write this blog series because it’s something I’ve mastered. These are things that God’s been teaching me lately. As I write these things, I’m not just sharing them with you, I’m preaching them to myself.
Each post we will look at:
How God displays the characteristic
Behaviors we need to prune away
What it looks like to bear the fruit in motherhood
Verses to nourish and fortify our soil and soul
A prayer we can focus on to re-center our motives and remind us of our source
How to teach your kids about it
The idea behind this series is to think about how we can reflect the fruit of the Spirit where God has us right now. For me it’s being a stay-at-home mom. I encourage you to adapt these to your own life and your own struggles.
Reflect on who God is. Think about things you need to put off and ways you can be growing. Be built up by God’s Word. Spend time praying about it. And teaching others.
The next nine posts will be published once a week on Tuesdays. It will give you something to meditate on each week as you go about your day.
The fruit of the Spirit is not just a cute and colorful song we teach our kids. The fruit is the overflow of the Spirit working in our life. It is evidence of a life devoted to God, and it’s integral to our relationships with the people in our lives.
I hope you’ll join me in this reflection series and that we can all grow together in Christlikeness in our mothering and beyond!
My prayer is that God would write these truths on my heart and yours and bring us into worship of our good and perfect God.